MIKEY SMITH: 7 wild and bizarre things Donald Trump did in 24 hours as he threatens Barbie Tax

Well, it's done then. We have a trade deal with the United States. Kind of.

On Wednesday night Trump called in the middle of an Arsenal match - a bold move for a President who badly needs a favour.

And by Thursday afternoon the pair were on another phone call - this time being broadcast to the from the Oval Office, announcing the "framework" for a trade deal.

You'll recall Trump declared the deal to be "comprehensive". That bit wasn't so much true. While it has carve-outs for steel and cars and beef and a few other things, the 10% tariff floor is very much still in place.

And while UK negotiators are hopeful that can be dealt with later, the vibes from the White House are less optimistic on that point. They like their tariffs, even for us.

Also not in the "comprehensive" deal is any assurance that the UK's film industry will be exempt from Trump's threat of 100% tariffs on foreign films - that's another thing to be negotiated separately, Trump said last night.

But both sides got what they wanted. Starmer gets to say we have a trade deal with the US, and gets to say he has a trade deal with somebody. Anybody.

Here's what went on in the Oval after the phone went down, and some more unhinged moments from Trump World.

1. Everyone's VERY impressed with what a good dealmaker he is

There's always a 'fluffing' session whenever Trump makes an announcement from the Oval Office...but the one after he announced the trade deal with the UK was particularly...effusive.

Chief fluffer was - as usual - Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, who we swear used to be pretty normal before all this.

"I want to make this clear," he gushed.

"This was the president's deal. People think, 'Oh, that's not the way it works.' If you got to sit next to him -- I have the best dealmaker to my left.

"And if you don't think that we take advantage of him calling the prime minister and getting that deal done, you don't understand who's the president.

"He's the closer. He gets deals done that we could never get done, because he understands business, he understands deals. And that's why we're here today."

Alright, calm down Howard.

2. He says dockworkers losing their jobs is "not a bad thing"

Asked whether he was worried that, as a result of his tariffs, traffic into US ports is slowing and thousands of dockworkers and drivers are worried about their jobs, the President of the United States said: "That means we lose less money ... when you say it slowed down, that's a good thing, not a bad thing."

3. And he had a little hold of Peter Mandelson's hand

Shortly after the election, there were concerns about Peter Mandelson's nomination as ambassador to the US.

Some people in Trump's orbit were concerned about the appointment, either because of his previous work with the or . Sources said Trump had been urged to reject the appointment - which he decided not to do.

Anyway, fast forward to last night, and the pair are in the Oval Office, crowing over a UK trade deal and ...literally holding hands.

Things move fast in Washington.

4. Trump cut taxes on Rolls Royces and Bentleys - but threatened 100% tariffs on Barbie dolls

Toymakers Mattel have indicated they plan to move production out of China to avoid Trump's trade war - but not to America. Following the lead of many other companies, they're looking at other locations, such as India, to avoid the tariffs. And that, dear readers, is one of many reasons why tariffs don't work in a modern global economy.

Asked about this in the Oval Office, shortly after announcing the trade deal with the UK, which among other things will prevent price hikes on British made luxury cars like Rolls Royces and Bentleys - he threatened to go after Mattel specifically, slapping the company with a 100% tariff on their products. Which, once again, isn't really how tariffs are supposed to work.

5. He's hired another Fox News host

After it started to look like his pick to be Washington DC's top prosecutor had lost support from Senate Republicans, Trump has ditched him - and picked someone from that seemingly infinite pool of government talent - Fox News - to replace him.

Jeanine Pirro will be, we think, the 22nd former Fox News personality to join the Trump administration.

And she will definitely be the most ridiculous.

The host, currently appearing as one of 'The Five' on the discussion programme of the same name, defended Trump during the "Access Hollywood" tape scandal, was named in a lawsuit after making false claims about Dominion Voting Machines in support of Trump's 2020 election claims - Fox settled for $787m - and was briefly suspended after she questioned Muslim Democratic Congresswoman Ilhan Omar's loyalty to the U.S. Constitution.

In 2018, Simon Maloy of Media Matters for America wrote that her "advocacy for the president is so aggressive that it often borders on insane - some of her commentary would be at home in an authoritarian state media apparatus."

At least Pete Hegseth only nearly killed a guy with an axe.

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6. The guy he was going to hire got spit on in the street

Ed Martin, Trump's previous pick for DC Attorney, has had a very rough week.

Martin, for those who aren't familiar, was a controversial pick, given he was instrumental in organising the "stop the steal" movement in 2020, which led to the violent attempted coup at the US Capitol.

And yesterday, someone recognised him in the street as he was giving a TV interview and did this...

7. RFK lied about the unlicensed Surgeon General pick

Health Secretary Robert F Kennedy Jr, America's most irresponsible nephew since Peter Parker, has been defending his (officially Donald Trump's) decision to hire someone who doesn't have a medical licence to be Surgeon General.

Casey Means, a 'Make America Healthy Again' influencer and practitioner of so-called "functional medicine" was announced as the new pick yesterday.

It comes after Trump withdrew his nomination of Dr Janette Nesheiwat, his original choice, just days before a congressional confirmation hearing.

As well as being a former Fox News contributor, Dr Nesheiwat is also the sister-in-law of ousted National Security Advisor Mike Waltz.

On the other hand, she did have a license to practice medicine.

Dr Casey, on the other hand, completed her primary medical training at Stanford, but dropped out of a residency programme at the University of Oregon, according to the Independent.

Challenged about her dropping out, RFK insisted: "She was top of her medical class at Stanford.

"During her residency, she won every award that she can win. She walked away from traditional medicine because she was not curing patients."

Of course, CNN's dedicated fact-checker Daniel Dale asked Stanford if that was true. They said it was not.

Stanford has no rankings because they use a pass-fail system rather than grades.